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Jamocha


 Proof of what can happen if a wife drags her husband along to go shopping.
 

 Dear Mrs. Murray,
 

 Our store is considering banning your family from ever shopping with
us, unless your husband stops his antics. Below is  a list of offences
over the past few months all verified  by our surveillance cameras.

 MEMO

 Re: Complaints

 15 Things Mr. Wayne Murray has done while his spouse is shopping:

 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to tampons section.

 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what  happened.

 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of  M&M's on lay-by.

 6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a  carpeted area.

 7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and  told the shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring  pillows from the bedding department.

 8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he  begins to cry and asks, "Why can't you people just leave  me alone?"

 9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as  a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

 10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department  asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants  are.

 11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly  humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

 12. December 6: In the auto department, practised his "Madonna  look"  using different size funnels.

 13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

 14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's  those voices again!!!

 And; last, but not least!

 15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited  a while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet  paper in here!"


 

Posted by Jamocha at 10:40 PM - 5 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 Feng Shui Horoscope
 

Write your answers on a piece of paper, NO cheating!!
 
The answers are in the comment section.....
 
 
1. Which is your favorite color: red, black, blue, green, or yellow?
 
 
2. Your first initial?
 
 
3. Your month of birth?
 
 
4. Which color do you like more, black or white?
 
 
5 . Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
 
 
6. Your favorite number?
 
 
7. Do you like California or Florida more?
 
 
8. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?
 
 
Posted by Jamocha at 10:23 PM - 6 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Working on my bedroom.....
 

Here are 16 tips to Feng Shui your bedroom. Make this all-important room a sanctuary:

* Ideally, the bedroom should be as far away as possible from the front door, mirroring the practice of our prehistoric ancestors who did not sleep in the mouth of their cave.

* On entering your bedroom, note where the windows are located. Chi tends to travel between the door and any windows, so avoid positioning your bed in line with this ‘draught’ of chi.

* Position your bed so that you can see the door from where you sleep. This gives you a deep sense of inner security.

* If it is feasible, position your bed as far away from the door as possible.

* Avoid sleeping with your head close to a window as your chi will dissipate through the window and make you feel more tired on awakening.

* If you have a bathroom, toilet or shower leading off your bedroom, make sure that the toilet door is always shut while you are asleep.

* To help you protect your own chi while you are asleep, to internalize it and recharge it, make sure you have a strong, stable headboard. Chi energy enters and exits the body through the feet, hands and the top of the skull, Having a solid ‘mountain’ behind you while you sleep is far more beneficial than a cold, blank wall or worse, the cutting chi of an ornate brass bedstead.

* If you sleep with another person, note the position of your bed relative to the wall that it is up against. Is it equidistant--in the middle of the wall? This is vital in a relationship as it gives both individuals who share the bed equality in the relationship. A shared bed crammed into the corner of a room, is giving more freedom of chi to the individual on the open side whereas the partner will literally and symbolically feel up against a wall.

* Make sure all bedside tables have rounded edges and not square to prevent cutting chi being focused towards the occupants. If two sleep in the bed, ensure matching beside tables on either side for added stability and protection in the relationship.

* Ceiling beams above the bed are a Feng Shui nightmare. They can be a source of cutting chi and the beams carry a tremendous load, and this pressure is focused into the beams generating chi which continues downwards, placing direct pressure on you while you sleep. Some tips:
Paint the beams; drape fabric over the beams; hang bamboo flutes 2-3 inches below the beam to soften the load (the flutes are hung at a 45 degree angle to the beam with the mouthpiece downwards).

* If you sleep with another, make sure your bed is symbolic of this relationship. Beds that are rickety or likely to fall part speak volumes about the state of the relationship.

* Given that the bedroom is a more yin environment, the lighting that you choose needs to reflect this. Soft lighting is ideal. Avoid having ceiling lamps right directly over your bed.

* Pastel colors are ideal.

* Avoid sleeping with your image visible in a mirror. the worst scenario of all is a mirror at the foot of your bed.

* Place something beautiful that inspires you where you first look in the morning.

* Pay attention to what is under your bed. Keep the space clear and get rid of any unwanted items there.

Posted by Jamocha at 11:24 PM - 3 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Photograph
 

This was filmed a stone's throw away from me....... love these guys too!!


Posted by Jamocha at 7:30 PM - 5 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 Gotta be played LOUD!
 

ac/dc thunderstruck

Add to My Profile | More Videos
Posted by Jamocha at 6:24 PM - 2 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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  About Me
Author: Jamocha
From CAN
Age: 40
 
This blog is about...
A whole lot of nothing!
 
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